It’s All In The Phrasing

Ebony Trophy Keepsake

Ebony Trophy Keepsake

While browsing through trying to find the ideal outdoor playset for my kids I happened to click on the Funeral tab as I always like to see which caskets they offer.  Call me sick but I find it brilliant that a big box retailer sells caskets at really good prices.

Once I got to the caskets my curiosity got the best of me and I had to visit the urn section which is a little more my speed anyway. That is when I ran across the above beauty – “Ebony Trophy Keepsake” for only $39.99. has the following to say about this marvelous product –

Ebony is a dark colored, dolomitic marble with calcareous banding. The dolomitic composition gives the rock a greater hardness. The intricate detailing and elegant design of the love urn establishes a lasting memorial.

R&S artisans created this unique trophy design with painstaking detail, inspired by the thought of awarding a life.

The trophy keepsake is a perfect memorial for those who wish to commemorate a loved one.

Quite beautiful and touching…except for two tiny, tiny details that caught my overall attention – Ebony “TROPHY” Keepsake and “the thought of AWARDING a life”.  Is the perfect gift for a serial killer?  When did we start calling the vessel that holds a loved ones’ remains a TROPHY?  I never thought of my dads ashes as a trophy but maybe I am in the minority.  Maybe some folks like to put this up on a mantle next to the buck they just killed.

And AWARDING a life, what the hell does that mean?  I know I am a bit dark but do you get to AWARD a life if you fill the TROPHY?  Now all I can picture is Robert Pickton, John Wayne Gacy and Ted Bundy sitting around admiring each others trophy rooms.

Must be me I guess.  Now where is that child’s playset again and where can I buy the carton of ketchup for $2.00?

About martineden

I am not here to please anyone.
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